As I look forward to the end of year 2009 and year-end holidays, I sigh in relief that another fruitful year has gone by. But, as I dwell on my plans for the remaining holidays, I find myself worrying about my form 5 life in the following year and how my thoughts will be consumed by my approaching SPM examinations.
Immediately I feel a flow of empathy coursing through me. My mind goes forward to 2010 when I imagine myself sitting for the dreaded SPM. Even now I can clearly imagine how I would rush for activities here and there because my mind is so preoccupied with what I need to do to complete the punishing daily revision schedule I have set out for myself.
My imagination just simply can't stop. In the days leading up to exam, I'm always rushing for time and my mind was constantly in turmoil. My biggest dilemma is wondering if I would be able to complete my revision in time.
The list goes on and on. What happened on me that made me such a worrying timid about future? For the first time in my life, I could no longer be in control of my everyday life. No matter how hard I thought about it, there was still no answer. Life is like a living hell indeed until I manage to pull my soul out from the complicated imagination.........
I start asking why again. And I finally got the answer. It was a short term displeasure in myself ever since I was told to become a choir conductor next year. The heavy duty and responsibility are the main worries as I look forward to focus more in my study. Nonetheless I do enjoy the special attention of being the individual facing obstacles and challenges in life. This is also because I have a lot of moral support- best friend, dear friends, family and my favourite food.
After all, these are just a phase in one's life which will soon pass. One day I believe I will turn the page and there will be no more darkness in life. Thinking of it, since I'm still at that stage in life, why not make the best of it and make it a good chapter.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Monday, December 14, 2009
许多事，失去了才明白
当我们拿自己的幸福做赌注时，赢回的却是雪雨冰霜，一颗火热的心从此被冷藏起来。也许正如别人说，寂寞使两个人走到一起，当其中一个不再寂寞时，另一个变成了累赘。沉浸在幻灭的世事里，打击与措手不及，让人领悟与成长；可能够潇洒面对友谊创伤的，又有多少人呢？
人的感情就像拼图，有许许多多的人和事拼凑起来，那些得到的，扩大了拼图的范围；而那些失去的，就让拼图有个缺。一段深厚的情谊并不容易积累，当缺失的一角没有办法获得填补时，人又怎能不憔悴呢？
上天慷慨地赐予了这俩有如亲兄妹很多，其中包括一些不可思议的回忆和点点滴滴。如果叫一方以泛红的眼目把它送远去，或许是最痛的神色；揪疼的心情无法自制，任铁石心肠也融化。留不住的，是那友谊的花朵；留下的，又是什么呢？
人的感情就像拼图，有许许多多的人和事拼凑起来，那些得到的，扩大了拼图的范围；而那些失去的，就让拼图有个缺。一段深厚的情谊并不容易积累，当缺失的一角没有办法获得填补时，人又怎能不憔悴呢？
上天慷慨地赐予了这俩有如亲兄妹很多，其中包括一些不可思议的回忆和点点滴滴。如果叫一方以泛红的眼目把它送远去，或许是最痛的神色；揪疼的心情无法自制，任铁石心肠也融化。留不住的，是那友谊的花朵；留下的，又是什么呢？
Friday, November 20, 2009
每一个人都不要自卑，人类有七大智能:
1. 语言/ 口才智力
2. 音乐/ 节奏智力
3. 身体/ 运动智力
4. 视觉/ 空间关系智力
5. 沟通/ 人际交往智力
6. 数理/ 逻辑智力
7. 性格特征/ 个性智力
人类有七大智能，在一个人的身上总有几项最发达的智能。举例：如果让刘翔，姚明去读理化，无论怎样努力，考试恐怕都不及格；如果让周家定，杨振宁这些数学家物理学家去跑步，打篮球，就是练上几十年也达不到刘翔，姚明的水平。
数理化学的人，他的数理/ 逻辑智能发达；而体育好的人，他的身体/ 运动智能发达。
《星光大道》节目上的一些十几岁的娃娃，能歌善舞，他们的音乐/节奏感智能很发达；像列宁，孙中山这些伟人的语言/ 口才智能很发达，他们的演讲富有热情，有文采，很有鼓动性，观众都相信他们。
我们人生应该有理想和目标，不能游戏人生。生活的态度应该是先甜后苦，前半生应该奋斗，后半生应该收获。
生活的方式应该是丰富多彩的。我们拥有七大智能，你的身上总有几项智能是发达的，因此我们要自信不要自卑哦！！
（看来这是写来告诉我自己的吧！）
2. 音乐/ 节奏智力
3. 身体/ 运动智力
4. 视觉/ 空间关系智力
5. 沟通/ 人际交往智力
6. 数理/ 逻辑智力
7. 性格特征/ 个性智力
人类有七大智能，在一个人的身上总有几项最发达的智能。举例：如果让刘翔，姚明去读理化，无论怎样努力，考试恐怕都不及格；如果让周家定，杨振宁这些数学家物理学家去跑步，打篮球，就是练上几十年也达不到刘翔，姚明的水平。
数理化学的人，他的数理/ 逻辑智能发达；而体育好的人，他的身体/ 运动智能发达。
《星光大道》节目上的一些十几岁的娃娃，能歌善舞，他们的音乐/节奏感智能很发达；像列宁，孙中山这些伟人的语言/ 口才智能很发达，他们的演讲富有热情，有文采，很有鼓动性，观众都相信他们。
我们人生应该有理想和目标，不能游戏人生。生活的态度应该是先甜后苦，前半生应该奋斗，后半生应该收获。
生活的方式应该是丰富多彩的。我们拥有七大智能，你的身上总有几项智能是发达的，因此我们要自信不要自卑哦！！
（看来这是写来告诉我自己的吧！）
Saturday, November 14, 2009
爱太痛
他曾经深深地爱过一个人，对她充满无限的思念，曾经以为自己可以忘记，但时间在流逝，好多人和事都在不停地改变，以为自己对她的眷恋，也会随时间的流逝而冲淡，可是他错了，不但没有，反而随着时间的流逝，变得越来越难以割舍，就像是一坛上好的酒，封存的时间越久越加的香甜，越陷越深，无法自拔。
多年来她一直缠绕在他的梦里，梦中有她的微笑，她那模样，这么多年他居然还能清楚的记得她的样子，不管她在何方，不管距离有多远，是否能见到她，他都深深的迷恋她，他对她是发自内心的眷恋，她已经在他心里驻扎生根，甚至是成了苍天大树，他不能随时间的推移而淡忘她。
她会跟随他一辈子吗？他不知道，眷恋她太深了。真的用了心，动了情。。
他只想静静的想念她，静静的眷恋她。
在错的时间相遇，在错的时间恋上了她。
爱太痛，只能变成永久的回忆。
Friday, September 25, 2009
May our path, meet again...
As the song begins to be sung, it gives a person a blessed experienced, they had just seen real emotion, an oddity in these days. Emotions overwhelm me as I sing the song. I suddenly find myself starring at a person standing right in front of me. She's undoubtedly a special and significant figure in my life. As i look at her back, I recall the memories of us. I can still vividly remember how we got to know to each other. It was rather special especially the first few words we had for the very first time. "
Just when I thought I could be as happy as a king, I have a feeling in my guts all of a sudden. It is a kind of fear. What fear? The fear of losing someone. I clearly know that nothing lasts forever, even staying close to your closed ones.
IF WE NEVER MEET AGAIN...
It's very possible that our paths may never cross again...
I'm glad we had the opportunity to meet, but I realize that in this fast-paced world we may never see each other again. Still, I'm eager to share a discovery with you that has made a lasting difference in my life. What you have here in your hands sums it up.
Discovering our purpose for being here...
Life was intended to be much more than just working to stay ahead of bills, living for weekends, and marking time between birth and death. Life was meant to be a very satisfying experience, not just an existence.
After all that I’ve done for you, I've no regrets so far..
After all these years, knowing you in my life is always my absolute privilege.
The magic we are having, is nearing, very soon nearing a final end. We have shared much, much more- more of myself, than I can defend.
Every minute that passes, passes us by,
I dread the inevitable.
A time when we should say goodbye,
and leave a life, that’s been incredible. By then the memories we’ve lived, are forever, forever burned in my soul.
What can i do now before it's too late is by showering you with the greatest joy. May you realize your life’s dreams- happiness to its extremes. It seems we’ve been down, this road,
many times before. And in turn life has taught, my heart, to invest no more. You have seen all the passion, and the love, that I can give.
If we should wave goodbye and be drifted apart one day, I wish you always life long joy, our bond time can’t destroy. I knew deep inside early on, we would see this day. The time will come for us-- soon to go our own way. You have added to who I am- far greater than a passing fling. I wish success with all, all that life may bring. The times we are having are quite sweet- but everything must end. If we are separated, may our paths cross real soon-perhaps on 31st of February. I’ve shared all the love, my heart, can allow. We will move on soon, and carry on somehow.
My heart will be on tears. Au revoir are the only last few words that I would said to you if the day comes.
Just when I thought I could be as happy as a king, I have a feeling in my guts all of a sudden. It is a kind of fear. What fear? The fear of losing someone. I clearly know that nothing lasts forever, even staying close to your closed ones.
IF WE NEVER MEET AGAIN...
It's very possible that our paths may never cross again...
I'm glad we had the opportunity to meet, but I realize that in this fast-paced world we may never see each other again. Still, I'm eager to share a discovery with you that has made a lasting difference in my life. What you have here in your hands sums it up.
Discovering our purpose for being here...
Life was intended to be much more than just working to stay ahead of bills, living for weekends, and marking time between birth and death. Life was meant to be a very satisfying experience, not just an existence.
After all that I’ve done for you, I've no regrets so far..
After all these years, knowing you in my life is always my absolute privilege.
The magic we are having, is nearing, very soon nearing a final end. We have shared much, much more- more of myself, than I can defend.
Every minute that passes, passes us by,
I dread the inevitable.
A time when we should say goodbye,
and leave a life, that’s been incredible. By then the memories we’ve lived, are forever, forever burned in my soul.
What can i do now before it's too late is by showering you with the greatest joy. May you realize your life’s dreams- happiness to its extremes. It seems we’ve been down, this road,
many times before. And in turn life has taught, my heart, to invest no more. You have seen all the passion, and the love, that I can give.
If we should wave goodbye and be drifted apart one day, I wish you always life long joy, our bond time can’t destroy. I knew deep inside early on, we would see this day. The time will come for us-- soon to go our own way. You have added to who I am- far greater than a passing fling. I wish success with all, all that life may bring. The times we are having are quite sweet- but everything must end. If we are separated, may our paths cross real soon-perhaps on 31st of February. I’ve shared all the love, my heart, can allow. We will move on soon, and carry on somehow.
My heart will be on tears. Au revoir are the only last few words that I would said to you if the day comes.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
爸爸，生日快乐！
如果回想童年，有片哗啦啦掠过阳光的树荫总在记忆中——小时候坐在爸爸自行车的前横梁上，仰头总能望到这番景象。那段路非常长，笔直的，伴随沿途风景的还有爸爸的故事，有时讲着讲着，就是很明显的胡编乱造了。
但是爸爸一直很有耐心的，很愉快的，这样讲啊讲啊，讲到我看着树叶几乎睡了过去。
但是爸爸一直很有耐心的，很愉快的，这样讲啊讲啊，讲到我看着树叶几乎睡了过去。
日后发现，在生命中能这样有耐心对我的男人，只有他。
爸爸有时候对我也很严厉。
打屁股、关小黑屋一样没少过，又是我妈说，我小时候倔得要命，和我爸，如出一辙。
事后我们父子二人，就此培养出某种默契似的，他发火时我从不出声，三分钟即会一切平复。这种恰当的沉默在日后为我来带不少好处。
打屁股、关小黑屋一样没少过，又是我妈说，我小时候倔得要命，和我爸，如出一辙。
事后我们父子二人，就此培养出某种默契似的，他发火时我从不出声，三分钟即会一切平复。这种恰当的沉默在日后为我来带不少好处。
从小到大，爸爸从来没有强迫过我去当什么好学生，或者跟其他小孩那样学东学西，几乎都是散养状。
尽管在青少年时期，他和妈妈之间的感情时好时坏，却从未让我感觉疏离，并被保护良好——我用爸爸的眼睛去看待世界，一切都很澄清。即没有不劳而获，也没有无端端的冤屈。所有愉快和不愉快的都是人生经历而已。
爸爸总说，他没有在物质上给我创造太多优越。
其实他给了我这样一笔巨大的财富，直到挥霍至老，都取之不尽。
我问爸爸，生日愿望是什么。
他说，希望能看到我成功且自立。
“爸爸，我会努力实现它的。”
现在爸爸和我虽然每天都住在同一个屋檐下，有时候没说几句话就会看到他忙碌的身影匆匆而去. 爸爸近两年更是操劳了许多, 头上脱了不少的头发，脸上也长出了小小的皱纹。但是爸爸在我心中永远潇洒年轻因为他无比年轻的心态！他的心灵永远会伴着他年轻的心态舞动！他的脚步永远向 着道路宽广的那一边不断迈近！！爸爸是我人生当中的坐标，没有他我今生今世不能站在这样的高度上去远望！感谢你，爸爸，因为你, 梦想的距离变得不再遥远! 今天是你的生日, 这一天儿子没有什么特别送给你的礼物, 因为他不想花爸爸的钱给爸爸的生日买礼物, 他只想对他说一句话：
“爸，我爱你。。祝你生日快乐， 身心如意！”
“爸，我爱你。。祝你生日快乐， 身心如意！”
Friday, September 11, 2009
A candle at its last moments...
4:07pm, the time where most normal people would have been busy with their respective activities... What am I doing then? In this moment of silence where I can only hear the clock ticking and the sound of my own heartbeat. Peering out the tinted window between the narrow opening of the greenish-grey floral curtains, I could see the trees dancing in breeze as if they were there to cheer me up. Once again, the blue sky had been taken over by dark clouds and soon the rain would fall. On the spur of the moment, I had time to reflect on my day. What had I done today? To be honest nothing productive...
My memories of the past, the moments of joy and anguish came back to me like a tornado..... BANG!! I suddenly found myself thinking back of my sad school life in form 4... The painess I had is like an arrow piercing through my heart. My once colourful world had now turn grey and lifeless.
The painful moments in 2009:
1. Being accused by a teacher.
2. Not given even the slightest recognition and appreciation from somebody after sacrifising so much for something.
3. Had heated arguments with friends because of some complicated misunderstandings.
4. Poor time management that causes me for being so lethargic all the time.
5. Fooled by close friends in a video clip. Unbelievable!?
6. Insulted by a friend for failing to do well in my add maths paper during monthly test. ( As u know my mum is an add maths teacher.)
7. Missing my beloved when she's away for weeks....( to somewhere)
8. Felt extremely down when I was unable to celebrate my loved one's birthday with her and failed to be by her side. Instead she had a memorable one somewhere with others... Am i being jealous??
9. Juggle too much between studies and activities.
10. Loss respects from school teachers mainly due to my long time absence in class and often hand in homework late (with reasons).
11. Disappoint my mum when there's complaints from teachers about me in staff room, be it the small matters.. I wil get screwed up after that k?!
12. Being 'emo' too much in front of my close friends. They got annoyed and obviously very irritated.
13. Loss my place in representing the school badminton team in district level competition even after playing impressively in my game in front of teacher, mainly because of discrimination.
14. Scolded by dad unnecessarily at times and family isn't supportive enough.
15. Unable to excel in studies and co-curricular activities. Fail to live up the expectations on me. After putting much effort, yet i still find myself at the losing end....
16. Hate being compared to others. ( I'm who I am, I don't change myself to accomodate others.)
17. Love exists but not in me.
18. Had a serious conflict with my good friend.
19. Accused of being fake and not sincere.
20. Never plays a good role as a leader. A good-for-nothing.
What've I done to deserve such fate? Things that I've been believing all this while have not stood me in good stead. In times of adversity I've been strong and unwavered in my belief that this is just part and parcel of life and I should just knuckle up and soak it up...it seems I'm very close to breaking down. No matter how brave a face I put up in front of people and act like I'm very tough but the naked truth is that the countless obstacle I faced had not toughen me up. It has just weakened my resolve...I hate to admit that I'm fragile but this is what I am now. Feeling totally defeated and discouraged that I had screwed up again!!
Silent tears started rolling down my cheeks unstoppably....................................... How I wished the pouring rain would wash my tears away. Only if I become a memory..........be it one day....
My memories of the past, the moments of joy and anguish came back to me like a tornado..... BANG!! I suddenly found myself thinking back of my sad school life in form 4... The painess I had is like an arrow piercing through my heart. My once colourful world had now turn grey and lifeless.
The painful moments in 2009:
1. Being accused by a teacher.
2. Not given even the slightest recognition and appreciation from somebody after sacrifising so much for something.
3. Had heated arguments with friends because of some complicated misunderstandings.
4. Poor time management that causes me for being so lethargic all the time.
5. Fooled by close friends in a video clip. Unbelievable!?
6. Insulted by a friend for failing to do well in my add maths paper during monthly test. ( As u know my mum is an add maths teacher.)
7. Missing my beloved when she's away for weeks....( to somewhere)
8. Felt extremely down when I was unable to celebrate my loved one's birthday with her and failed to be by her side. Instead she had a memorable one somewhere with others... Am i being jealous??
9. Juggle too much between studies and activities.
10. Loss respects from school teachers mainly due to my long time absence in class and often hand in homework late (with reasons).
11. Disappoint my mum when there's complaints from teachers about me in staff room, be it the small matters.. I wil get screwed up after that k?!
12. Being 'emo' too much in front of my close friends. They got annoyed and obviously very irritated.
13. Loss my place in representing the school badminton team in district level competition even after playing impressively in my game in front of teacher, mainly because of discrimination.
14. Scolded by dad unnecessarily at times and family isn't supportive enough.
15. Unable to excel in studies and co-curricular activities. Fail to live up the expectations on me. After putting much effort, yet i still find myself at the losing end....
16. Hate being compared to others. ( I'm who I am, I don't change myself to accomodate others.)
17. Love exists but not in me.
18. Had a serious conflict with my good friend.
19. Accused of being fake and not sincere.
20. Never plays a good role as a leader. A good-for-nothing.
What've I done to deserve such fate? Things that I've been believing all this while have not stood me in good stead. In times of adversity I've been strong and unwavered in my belief that this is just part and parcel of life and I should just knuckle up and soak it up...it seems I'm very close to breaking down. No matter how brave a face I put up in front of people and act like I'm very tough but the naked truth is that the countless obstacle I faced had not toughen me up. It has just weakened my resolve...I hate to admit that I'm fragile but this is what I am now. Feeling totally defeated and discouraged that I had screwed up again!!
Silent tears started rolling down my cheeks unstoppably....................................... How I wished the pouring rain would wash my tears away. Only if I become a memory..........be it one day....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)